On May 23, 2009, a year after the death of my son, six months after the death of my mother, and five months after the death of my father, on the eve of the closing on my parent’s condo, I was diagnosed with lymphoma.
Following eight rounds of chemo and seventeen radiation treatments, on December 17, I was pronounced in remission. My anniversary date is coming up soon. I have been fortunate to be in remission ever since with only minor inconveniences from the treatment.
Sometime during the first year after my treatment, I became a First Connection volunteer for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. That means that when someone is diagnosed and wants to talk with someone who has been through what they are currently going through, I receive their name and give them a call. I think what I provide is mostly hope. I am in remission and living a full life. That is possible for them, too.
Last night I received a call from a woman I had talked with previously who had recently gone into remission. She wanted to know how long it took me to regain my energy and if I experienced depression at the end of treatment.
It is interesting as the years go by, my memory has faded. How long did it take me to regain my energy? How long until I felt myself again? How long until I was back in the swing of my life again? The details are fuzzy.
A vivid memory is encountering a friend I hadn’t seen in years in the parking lot of Dorothy Lane Market. A hat covering my bald head and still pale, she looked at me like a deer caught in headlights as she struggled to find words. “It looks like you’ve been through a lot.”
So overjoyed at being able to do my own grocery shopping again, to her seeming surprise, I gushed with excitement.
I am also clear that I did not experience depression at any time during or immediately after treatment, and for that I have my friends to thank. That period of my life was one of my happiest. Because I had no family able to give me support, local friends rallied round. My every physical and emotional need was met. I had no idea how important I was to them. I never felt so loved.
I started a Caring Bridge website. My world-wide professional relationship therapy/coaching community prayed for me and sent me loving messages of support. They spread the word and soon I was receiving prayers and messages from people I had never met from across the globe.
Every Thanksgiving I am grateful for my continuing remission. That call last night, however, increases my gratitude this year for lymphoma ushering in one of my most profound experiences of being loved.
I continue to be grateful for friends with whom to share loving relationships and who fill in like family when I need them. In the end, isn’t that what matters most?
My daughter and I will be sharing Thanksgiving with two of them.
Happy Thanksgiving 2018
and
I will give thanks if you will share at least one blessing for which you are grateful this season.
I am grateful for my three grandchildren and one on the way in April!
Susan,
I understand that grandchildren are among life’s greatest blessings. So happy for you to be graced with so many.
May you all have a blessed Thanksgiving.
Linda you have a capacity to experience the pain of humanity in a way few do. Maybe having come to peace with your own pain has given you that capacity. Few have it…..
Pain has been for me a great teacher. While I don’t like being in it anymore than anyone else, instead of trying to avoid it, I’ve learned to wait with it for the lesson to emerge. Now, I have to be clear … the pain I’m talking about is the pain that comes to everyone from living life. We all experience the loss of people we love to illness, loss from natural disasters, loss from accidents, disappointments, etc.
I’m not talking about the pain people experience because of war, discrimination, injustice, hatred, and cruelty. While I still think it is possible to learn from that pain, in my opinion, no one should have to endure it. I know that I’m privileged and have had to bear little of this kind of pain. My heart aches for those who do. And I never feel as though I’m doing enough to address these issues.
Linda, I saw you years ago for couples therapy. You were very helpful to both me and my husband. We will be celebrating 41 years of marriage in February. I will keep you in my prayers for good health. I hope that you and your daughter have a blessed Thanksgiving. Sincerely, Paula Schmidt
Congratulations, Paula,
Forty-one years of marriage is something to celebrate and for which to be grateful. Good for the two of you to have had the courage to reach out for help to get through the bumpy time that most marriages hit. It gives me great pleasure to have been a small part of your success in smoothing out the bumps. Thank you for letting me know … something more to add to my Thanksgiving gratitude list.
Thank you, also, for your prayers for my daughter and me. Prayers are always much appreciated. And may you and yours enjoy a blessed Thanksgiving.
Linda, your courage and personal integrity are a blessing to us all and I am grateful to call you friend!
Thank you, Prema,
I’m grateful to call you friend, as well. Your ability to see the big picture and speak with wisdom, even when times are tough, blesses me. I admire the way you have navigated the tough time you have recently faced, coming out on the other side excited about possibilities, growth, and transformation. Says something important about your character.
What a hopeful message you have given us!
Thank you, Roselin,
I very much appreciate your reaching out to me recently when I hit a health bump in the road. Your willingness to help if I needed it meant a lot.
Just look at you now!!! What a woman! I am grateful you are my friend. I treasure our friendship. Wishing you a grateful and joyful celebration of this special holiday. Happy Thanksgiving.
You know, Cindi, when the emergency room doctor told me they had found a tumor and it looked like lymphoma, after the initial shock waves subsided, the first person I thought of was Bob. I knew he had had lymphoma years before and he was still alive. That gave me hope as I hope I’m able to give the people who I contact through the First Connection program.
And you and Bob were some of those local friends who were there for me. I will never forget the healthy, beautiful to behold meals you graced me with … accompanied by flowers and beautiful placemats. You two know how to do it with pizzazz.
Your friendship all these many years means a lot to me. You are one of the bright spots in my life.
Hope you and Bob enjoy a lovely Thanksgiving in your new digs and I look forward to seeing you there in December. Much love to both of you.
So lovely to be in a field of gratitude and grace. Happiest of Thanksgivings to you and yours!!
Glad to oblige … and Happiest of Thanksgiving to you and yours as well. Partying with family has got to be a blessing.
What a wonderful blog post! Two of the blessings I am very grateful for this year are your friendship and the inspirational messages in your blog posts.
Wow, thank you, Carol,
You bless me with your friendship, as well. So glad we are in each other’s lives. Looking forward to our first Thanksgiving together tomorrow.
Thank you for your inspiring words. As I look toward the holidays I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for my dad who passed away this year. I miss him every day but am blessed by treasured memories. He was quite a character! Wishing you a wonderful Thanksgiving with chosen family.
Hi Kathy,
I’m sorry I didn’t get to know your dad. Always interested in meeting “characters.” Your mother is such a sweetie. I know where you get it from. So glad your treasured memories of your dad lead to overwhelming gratitude for you.
A gratitude for me is getting to know you a little better this past year. I look forward to more connections in the year to come.
May you have a blessed Thanksgiving with your family as well.