The Challenge
Planning a Celebration of Life for Barbara and Bill proved to be a challenge. Barbara’s daughters live in Florida and Georgia. Bill’s daughter and son live in Oregon. The service would be held in Middletown, Ohio, where Barbara grew up and where Bill had lived most of his adult life.
Barbara and Bill moved to Portland in 2014 with Barbara well into Alzheimer’s. Bill began to deteriorate physically a couple of years before their deaths eighteen days apart in 2021. Once glioblastoma was diagnosed, he was no longer able to communicate coherently during the four months before his death. The pandemic on complicated matters more.
Bill’s family had access to information about his life for his obituary. But a lot of information about Barbara was missing. When the family asked me to provide a Commemoration of their lives at their Celebration of Life, I had all the information I needed to give a picture of the exceptional man Bill was. Determined to convey just as fully the extraordinary woman Barbara was, I had work to do.
Bachelor’s Degree?
I knew Barbara had graduated from Mount St. Joseph College in Cincinnati majoring in Communications. I attended her graduation party and thought it was in 1978, but wasn’t sure.
I called Mt. St. Joe’s and was connected to the registrar’s office. Given that Barbara was 90 at the time of her death and I knew her date of birth and parent’s names, the woman answering the phone agreed to research the information I needed. A few days later I had confirmation of her 1978 graduation and the correct title of her degree … a Bachelor of ARTS in Communication.
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Master’s Degree?
Barbara earned her Master’s degree from Matthew Fox’s institute in Oakland, California. Finding the Institute of Culture and Creation Spirituality on the internet was easy. But what was the year and the name of her degree? I called a mutual friend, Cindi, who is also a graduate and whose attendance overlapped with Barbara’s. A Masters in Leadership and Creation-Centered Spirituality in 1996.
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Award?
I knew that Barbara had received national recognition. I knew it had something to do with the downturn the steel industry experienced. I researched and found that it was in the early 80s that massive layoff’s occurred.
I combed the archives of the Middletown Journal, thinking surely they had written an article about it. I found nothing.
One day in desperation I turned to Google. I can’t remember what all I entered, but I do remember these three: President Reagan …….. Award ……… Laid-off Steel Workers.
I couldn’t believe my eyes. Four YouTube videos popped up. I clicked on the first one.
It was the whole White House Ceremony. For the first time, I got to see Barbara walk across the stage, shake hands with President Reagan, and accept the award. I was so excited, I almost jumped out of my skin. I’ll bet neither Barbara nor Bill knew this video existed on the internet.
Now I had all the information!
Barbara’s most significant achievement during the thirty years she worked for Armco Steel Corporation occurred between November 1982 and May 1984. She coordinated LEAP (Laid-off Employee Assistance Program) developed to support over 1100 laid-off steel workers at Middletown Works. The 600+ employees who volunteered raised $278,000 to fund assistance with creditors, social service agencies, and job searches. They enlisted a local grocery store to give substantial discounts. Barbara traveled to the White House and on May 7, 1984 she accepted, on LEAP’s behalf, the President’s Volunteer Action Award from President Reagan.
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With the help of Bill’s son and granddaughter, the video was edited to feature Barbara and shown at the Celebration of Life. My heart thrilled when the noisy room grew quiet and full attention was given to watching Barbara receive this prestigious award.
Mission accomplished! Job well done! I did right by my dear friend and soul sister, Barbara.
What a great story about both your friend, Barbara, and the wonderful and dedicated friend you are. Love this!
Thank you, Pam. The greatest compliment I received from Anne Wilson Schaef when I trained with her is, “You do friend well.” I try to live up to that. Don’t always succeed, but I work at it.
Lovely. Glad you are peace about your remarkable contribution to your soul sister’s Memorial Service.
I am at peace. Barbara deserves the best!
Love it!
Thank you for making such an effort to uncover Barbara’s lifetime achievements. Women are still “getting lost” in history. Her family will treasure the video now and hopefully send it into the future with the next generation. She made a huge difference in her community. Definitely admirable!
Thanks, Jen.
That is a good point, Joellen. But you know, I didn’t even think about it in those terms. It was very personal for me. You are so right … she made a huge difference in her community and in the lives of many friends. I’m so blessed to have been one of them.
Your loyalty and dedication to friends is to be cherished!!!! I feel blest to call you ‘friend’. You are a model of what that means….
Thank you, Diana, I work at it. And I’m blessed to be your friend, as well. Your support means a lot to me.
This is awesome, Linda! To do that work and find these amazing things that she did is admirable. What a celebration of life. .
Thank you, Pam, Being able to give as full a picture of Barbara as possible is what made the celebration of her life meaningful to me. I had to do the work. And wasn’t I lucky to find that video! It still amazes me when I think about it.
I love this description of the way you so lovingly pulled together all the information you needed to create the Celebration of Life for Barbara and Bill. You worked hard on this presentation and you definitely did right by both of them. What an example of loving friendship!.
You followed me in the process so you know full well how hard I worked at it. They were both amazing people and deserved the best. And I was determined to see that they got it. It was a lot harder to get everything about Barbara, but it was fun becoming a Super Sleuth. I work at being loving in my friendships. Barbara did get mad at me a couple of times, but she was a forgiving woman. I’m grateful for that.