A new commandment I give you. Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this, everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.
~Jesus of Nazareth in John 13:34-35
Dayton Literary Peace Awards
Saturday I attended “A Conversation with the Authors” ~ ~ with three finalists for this annual award. They shared the topics of their books … how ordinary people dealt with and survived world events like Mao’s cultural revolution in China, Hitler’s Holocaust perpetrated on Jews in Europe, and the burning of Black Wall Street by white racists in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
So many words of wisdom from these young authors. I wish I could remember them to quote them here. What I do remember and found interesting, is that those who experienced these atrocities did not want to talk with their children about it. However, when their grandchildren started asking questions, they opened up. These descendants feel compelled to keep the stories alive … by writing about them or telling their story to writers and authors of books.
Following the finalist’s conversations was one with Jason Carter, Jimmy Carter’s grandson and the chair of the Board of Trustees for the Carter Center. I did not know that Jimmy
- wrote 32 books, many promoting peace;
- in November 2024, received his 10th nomination for the Grammy Award for Best Spoken Word Album for audio recordings of his books;
- has won three Grammy Awards for
- Our Endangered Values: America’s Moral Crisis (2007);
- A Full Life: Reflections at 90 (2016); and
- Faith: A Journey For All (2018)
Jason and his brother, Josh, were in Dayton to accept the 2024 Ambassador Richard C. Holbrooke Distinguished Achievement Award for their grandfather, who turned 100 on October 1.
As I listened
… to the traumatic stories about the cultural revolution in China, the Holocaust in France, and the annihilation of a successful black business community in Tulsa, my stomach churned. Questions arose …
- what tragedies and hard times are ahead for our country?
- will I find the strength and resilience to face them with integrity?
- will I be able to hold on to my values no matter what comes?
- will I be able to stand steady on shaky ground?
And then I heard Jason Carter speak wisdom about our polarized nation … a message he learned from his grandfather’s words and actions.
We’ve got to learn to talk with each other. There’s more that unites us than divides us. We are more alike than we are different. ~Jason Carter
My Search for “alikeness” began in 2017
Aware that I live in a silo, I began to search for a way to expand my horizons.
Braver Angels: In 2016, in the aftermath of that year’s presidential election, an organization called Braver Angels was born right here in Southwest Ohio. Bill Doherty, a professor and practitioner of family therapy created workshops using communication tools from his field of expertise in order to bring people together to communicate and explore their different perspectives in a healthy way.
I learned about Braver Angels in 2017 and began attending Southwest Ohio Alliance meetings and debates. I attended a workshop held in Cincinnati. In that workshop I witnessed what Jason Carter said, “We are not as far apart as we think we are.”
I was enthusiastic because Braver Angels uses the tools in which I was trained in my professional life as an addictions family therapist, a relationship therapist and coach for couples.
I became very active, inviting friends and recruiting others. I took the moderator training. I was invited by David Lapp, a conservative and BA founder who lives in SWO, to meet with him and another conservative thinking about joining. We met at a coffee shop and had an in-depth three-hour conversation that included how our personal lives led us to our perspectives on political issues.
This conversation is the highlight of my experience with BA.
I volunteered to organize a workshop and partnered with that conservative gentleman to bring it to fruition. It was held on February 29, 2020 … less than 2 weeks before the March 12 COVID lockdown.
Braver Angels is flourishing across the USA and beyond. Check them out at this link.
One Small Step: After the isolation of COVID, I needed and continue to need more personally-oriented relationships … like the one held at that coffee shop. I needed to form friendships beyond political views. Except for that one coffee shop meeting, that need was not fulfilled in Braver Angels.
And then I learned about Story Corp’s One Small Step Program. This program “brings people with different views together to record a conversation — not to debate politics — but simply to get to know each other as people.”
That’s more what I was longing for. I am more of a relater than a debater.
I was inspired by a video where two women were interviewed about their experience having an in-person conversation. They live in a Story Corp hub city making that possible. One was black and conservative; the other white, liberal, and gay.
They have similar interests in philanthropic activities, are working on a project together, and have become good friends.
And so, I signed up for a conversation. Mine would have to be online, a definite disadvantage but better than nothing.
I was paired with a lovely young woman living in NYC. When she was a baby, her parent’s moved from Iran to England, where she was raised. She came to the USA on a business trip, met a man who continues to inspire her, and they married and have a couple of children.
I was fascinated with her story and thoroughly enjoyed our conversation. However, our profiles didn’t reveal that we are much more on the same wavelength politically, so there was no opportunity to discover how we are more alike than different in that area. And even if we had, there was no opportunity to develop an on-going relationship.
Because of the way that system works, each person has to agree to a conversation after looking at each other’s profiles. So far, I have not been paired with anyone else. Here’s a link to check them out.
A Surprising Opportunity
Totally outside the realm of politics, I met and joined with a group of women who meditate and study books. Currently, we are studying Michael Singer’s book, The Untethered Soul. Last week’s chapter dealt with freeing ourselves from emotional pain … in order to grant freedom to our soul. This group does not talk about politics.
At our Wednesday meeting, the day after the election, several veiled expressions of emotional pain arose. Those of us experiencing it, knew why. I joined them in naming my own. One woman in the group didn’t know what we were talking about. When told the pain was connected to the election, she expressed her excitement at the results. Another quietly admitted she was, too.
The room grew quiet as differences emerged. How would we, as spiritually-oriented women, deal with this? I remained calm even though my insides were shaky.
One woman noted that this pain is all about fear. She quoted a Bible verse. I think it was this one, but I can’t be sure. After my 3:30 am awakening, I was not running on all cylinders.
… fear not for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.” ~Isaiah 41:10
Many in the group were touched. Inspired by that passage of scripture, the group came to an end by praying … “May TRUST arise.”
After our prayer, I just wanted to run away. However, during the group discussion, I saw a way in which I could be of help in the personal life of the first woman expressing excitement. While in the bathroom, the still small voice within me spoke firmly. “You need to extend yourself beyond your fear and offer your insight.”
Following orders, I returned to the living room and asked permission. She gave it. I shared my insight. She hugged me and expressed appreciation for me.
As I drove home, I still wanted to run away. But my Spirit Guide reminded me, “This is just the opportunity you’ve been looking for.” Duh!
Two days later, I received a text thanking me “from the bottom of my heart” for my insight, relaying how helpful it had been.
Every positive human action generates grace, just as a prayer does. ~Caroline Myss
My Way of Bridging Differences
As I said, “I am more of a relater than a debater.”
Ringing in my ears are the words of Jimmy Carter spoken through his grandson.
We’ve got to learn to talk with each other. There’s more that unites us than divides us. We are more alike than we are different.
Once I get myself centered again, I intend to ask for a conversation about our differences. I plan to put on my best “curiosity” hat and use my best communication skills.
I think she will agree to it. We already have a common interest … I hope to uncover more areas where we are “more alike than different.” Stay tuned.
Finding Meaning
One thing that all spiritual paths have in common is that they help their followers to find meaning in the world.
I continue my search for meaning. It seems my Spirit Guide gives me no choice. 😊
This is how I’m attempting to bridge our country’s polarization.
How about you?
You are amazing!!!’ Love your writing. You are spot on sister! I am still in process on my direction. Will keep you informed
I look forward to hearing what your direction will be. We have to remember, every contribution, no matter how small, makes a difference.
This is what I am going to do. in this moment…I just got off the phone with someone dear to me who was very upset with the election and was deeply hurt because someone dear to her had voted for Trump. His policies are very dangerous for her. In this moment I am going to forward your podcast to her….that is what I can do….feeling sad and hoping it will help!!!!
I hope what I wrote makes a difference for this person so dear to you. And I hope this election does not irreparable damage the divide between those who are dear to any of us. It is such a sad time. Tearing us apart from those we love would be a tragedy. We need each other now more than ever.
Hello Linda. You are so brave. I could not have done what you were able to do the day after the election. I moved into despair at what the majority of voters found acceptable in a person that doesn’t have any redeeming character assets that I can discern. It’s still very hard for me to believe that a felon, a sexual assault man, a thief of national secret documents, a leader of a violent insurrection, a person that does not believe in the rule of law was re elected to the top position. I have 4 sisters in Florida that voted for him. They think I have been misled, not told the truth, and that Jan. 6 didn’t happen because they saw a video prepared by Tucker Carlson to show it was non violent and nothing happened. Crossing the bridge ahead and getting to talk to people from the very conservative view is more than I can do right now, but I do appreciate your wise words and guidance. And, thank you for finding your better Angel within.
Oh, Teresa, I don’t see what I did as brave. I offered a hurting human being the gift I have to give her. The voice of Spirit inside me would not let me get away with anything less than bringing my “better angel” to the fore. It was something easy for me to do at the level of skill and it has made a big difference for this person. I only hope this small gesture will make a huge difference in her view of the world. Maybe not now, but every small step we take in the direction of awakening is healing for the whole. I’m not able to do it with family as yet. And I’m grateful I haven’t been prompted from within to do so. We all have to find our way and do the best we can. You are doing such important work in many areas. Just because you aren’t able to talk with family now doesn’t mean that what you are doing isn’t vitally important. I know it hurts when we are disconnected from family. Just remember to take good care of yourself.
Linda, I hope my comments to you made it to your desk.
Mahlon
I wish they had. Your comments are always so valuable.
I LOVE this post. You are making such a valuable contribution towards connecting people beyond the divides,. I love how your exploration of different programs, and your inner guide, have brought you to what’s “just right” for you!
The Caroline Myss quote is so powerful; thanks for including it and also the Jimmy Carter story. Carter deserves so much acknowledgement as a humanitarian leader and keeper of sacred values. I am glad he is still here to see his grandson receive this special award.
Thank you for your enthusiasm, Ani,
What I’ve done and am doing is, as I see it, so small. Our regional Braver Angels Alliance sent an invitation to have dinner together to talk across the divide. I haven’t responded and feel a churning in the pit of my stomach at the thought. I’m noticing that Alliances in other parts of the country are much more active and stronger than ours. Ironic, since Braver Angels started in SWO. I still have some time to sit with this invitation. I must listen to the Voice of Spirit inside for guidance about my response. Stay tuned.
Caroline Myss is my major spiritual guide and I find much of what she says full of wisdom. She helps to keep me centered and I’m counting on guidance like hers to keep my stable as the ground shakes beneath our feet.
I remember when Jimmy Carter, a virtual unknown appeared on the scene. I admire him in so many ways. I don’t think he was ever given his due as a President. He wouldn’t play political games and it cost him. And he went on to accomplish great things in the world. Lots to admire.