I think most of us need to know we make a difference. It gives our life meaning and purpose. In my professional life, I had opportunities to make a difference almost daily. Recently a chance encounter reminded me of one such difference I had made years before. I was reading a book and not paying attention to the other people in the car wash waiting room when a young man approached me saying, “Don’t I know you?”
It took me only seconds to recognize one of my favorite former clients. The session I facilitated for him and his family is among my most memorable. He proudly told me he is twenty years sober, saying, “I can’t believe the life I have now.” It was clear he continues to embrace quality recovery. And it is gratifying to know I played a small part in launching him into his amazing new life.
Today, in retirement, with my conscious-eldering focus on “being,” it is not always so easy to know if being who I am makes a difference. And so I was thrilled to learn this week that I did.
Our Angel Group begins our meeting with a meditation. The one we used a couple of weeks ago referenced surrender. A new member asked, “How do you surrender?” Two of us shared powerful experiences we’ve had surrendering during trying times.
This week, during our time of sharing gratitude, our new member relayed the compelling experience she’d had as a result of hearing our stories. When she heard about the peace that came over us, she decided to surrender an issue that had been troubling her. Tears streamed as she shared about the peace she, too, had found. I was deeply moved to know my sharing had made such a difference…in my favorite way…up close and personal.
I write about my experience of surrender in my memoir, A Long Awakening to Grace, and believe my story will make a difference, especially for those going through a difficult time. It is usually our painful challenges that bring us to our knees. That was certainly true for me. And my awakening to grace came as a result of the gift of peace that allowed me to relinquish the illusion that I had any control over the circumstances I was facing.
We humans are funny that way…thinking we can control the uncontrollable. I had a serious case of that kind of faulty thinking. Even today, after having experienced the miracle of grace in that situation where I had no control, when an uncomfortable circumstance triggers my desire to take charge, I need to remind myself that the only control I have is my response to whatever it is that is happening.
As another member of The Angels pointed out, surrender is something we need to do over and over and over.
Nice piece, Linda! Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you, Kate, glad you enjoyed it.
Hi Linda,
I loved this! It is so true that we often don’t know or actually don’t think we make a difference. I have lived with the latter idea much of my life. The truth is vastly different as you found out at the car wash and in the group.
I’m starting to “own” I make a much bigger difference than I ever thought I did. This carries more responsibility for being as sensitive and open as I can be.
Love to you!
Oh Ani, In our many conversations, you’ve demonstrated to me the enormous difference you have made in so many lives, including my own. I’m so grateful you are starting to own the reality. You are a precious friend. Much love back to you.
Linda you constantly give me food for thought, filling in areas where I am inadequate. It truly ‘takes a village’ and how blest I am to have you in my village teaching me over and over again that I am not in control and surrender is the only answer to something that is no much bigger…
Surrender, yes, and finding ways to take care of ourself in the process. That’s important, too. So I’m here when and if you need me.
“…the only control I have is my response to whatever it is that is happening.” Thinking we have control is a fallacy. There’s a difference between emotionally reacting and responding by surrendering to what is and as you say, “over and over again.
I look forward to reading your memoir!!
Learning to surrender has been one of my most important spiritual lessons and it took me a long time to learn it. It takes as long as it takes. Looks like you learned it at a much younger age than I. I often refer to myself as a slow learner, especially in things of the heart. My head keeps getting in the way. 🙂
Thanks for this lovely post, Linda. I so look forward to reading your memoir. I already love the title.
Thanks, Mary Jo, I look forward to reading yours, too. I know it will be deep and I love the way you are weaving quilting into your story.